No one can look as good as youuuu....

Everybody in the world is so fucked up. It sucks that every opinion and thought we have is just learned or influenced in some way. We all have complexes and finding a person that can deal with your fuckedupness is really really hard.

I know I have my own issues. I need to be with a person that can give me a lot of attention because I think I seriously lacked that as a child. I need to be with a person that is nonjudgmental and open minded, cause I'm not the girl next door by any means. I need to be with someone that listens cause I can talk for hours.

Well, I'm not gonna think about it anymore. I'm just thinking about past relationships today. I dated two guys in Chicago and you know what? They werent any of those things up there that I just said. In fact they were the opposite, all of the qualities that I have they hated. How can you end up with someone that hates the core parts of your personality. Well, I learned a lot from those relationships, I learned to never compromise myself. I think cause my first relationship was with Churi and we were in such love, I think I imagined all relationships to be like that, and guess what? They aren't. Most people are not compatible with other people and on top of that relationships take a lot of time and work.

So my lesson? Not to doubt myself and not to compromise anything. I seriously think that I am damaged a little and my self-esteem is a little shitty, but I'm in a healing process right now. I hope I'll be okay.

On a happier note, today is Friday and it's going to be a wonderful wonderful weekend.

Happy Friday Everybody!!!!!!!

yeah, mm hmm, okay sure...

Sheila and Polli just left. I made breafast for dinner, and now I'm drunk! LOL. Ugh. I'm gonna watch Greys now, it comes on at 1 am. I hate that fucking show. It's so unrealistic and the acting is terrible but its cute somehow someway. 

My mom and I got into a fight over a week ago, and she hasn't emailed me or called me at all. I'm a little hurt to be honest with you. But I will not call her first, I'm holding my ground on that. I know that's stupid and just being stubborn, but I don't care. 

Well, good night everyone.

IF YOU'RE HAPPY AND YOU KNOW IT, CLAP YOUR HANDS.

Today is Thursday! Yay. I'm happy about it. I love Fridays, I love weekends. Back in Chicago my work schedule was M-TH, and it's wonderful to start your weekend on Thursday.

Last night I went out with Polli and Sheila to this little Russian bar, it was nice and cozy. I don't really like going out much, I mean I like to hang out, but bars kinda suck. Maybe if I went out more I might meet someone new.

I am sick and tired of beating myself up over you all know what. Today I've been mopping around the office, I can't act like this any more. I need a fucking hobby or something. Maybe I should get a small pet, like Dirk Jr. ? Or learn to knit, or collect stamps. Tonight when I go home I'm going to paint something in Rodrigo's studio. Maybe after that I'll feel a little better. I wish I could get a hold of a wheel.

I've been listening to Belle & Sebastian and their music makes me sad. :(

HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY

Happiness is a direction, not a place. ~Sydney J. Harris

uh yeah

right now im fucked up :( hahaha i had being fucked up and alone. well, im gonna go smoke a bowl and go to bed. night!!

RIP ESTELLE

Someone yesterday asked on Chacha when Estelle Getty died, I didn't even know who that person was until I googed. And its the mom from Golden Girls the tv show, remember guys? She was like 80 when they were filming the tv show, anyway I am totally sad about this. :( RIP Estelle. I feel like someone personal has died, I got really sad about this last night :(

For more info click here

zeebraaa girl

Sheila wants me to add her animals to my blog farm. So here they are...her drawings are so pretty. Good job Sheila!! :)

Open your eyes baby.

Today is Tuesday. Another day of a pointless week. I wish I had something worth saying to say, but sadly I don't. My period is coming and I'm not feeling well at all. I wish I could just disappear, and feel nothing right now. Churi is coming with Sol his girlfriend in Dec and I was upset sorta at first when I found out. I'm not now, I need to be selfless with this situation. I hope he's happy, and she takes care of him because he needs it. I know that much at least. Maybe two hurt people that are broken shouldn't be together anyway. Maybe this time I need someone to take care of me, someone to be selfless with me too.

I want to travel, I want to do ceramics, I want to learn something new, I want to laugh, I want to cry, I want to wake early and sleep late, I just want to be happy.

Chacha ching!!

Hey Bitches of the underworld. HAhh. I had a terrible terrible dream that everyone that was smart and healthy was sent to the MOON and I was stuck here with all of the dumb and sick people. Ughhhhhh.

So last night was Brazilian night at La Casona and I went with all my roommates, it was a lot of fun. I hate that the place is so fucking hot, but despite that it was still a lot of fun.

I'm really going to try and enjoy the things we all do in the apartment together because I think very soon it's going to end. Everyone is sick of Beto not paying, or that the rent is too much, and we're all leaving. :( I like the apartment, even though they took out the pool table to put in Pingpong lameeee hahah.

Right now I'm at NY Bagel cafe in Via Argentina and man are there some hotties here. I'm chachaing it up, but I've been here nearly two hours and only made like 6 dollars. LOL That's pretty much what I spent to eat and get here. OH WELL. At least it was free to eat and hang out in the AC.

So I wrote Churi and email, how stupid am I? I just wanted to see how he was and make sure he's okay, I know that he's going through a lot of shit right now.

Hmmm...this coffee is soo goooood, I'm gonna go enjoy it. Take care and have a lovely Sunday. Tomorrow is Monday....rainy days and mondays.

K